A poll: When you reply does the content or tone of your reply depend on whether you think the poster is male or female? You have to be absolutely honest!


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When you answer a post do you change the tone or content of your reply in any way depending on whether you assume the poster is male or female?  (Other genders are acknowledged but  will not be considered here.)

You can’t actually know the gender of a poster for sure, but I think lots of people guess from the username.

Please vote honestly, throw political correctness to the wind and say what you’re thinking below!

 

When you answer a post do you change the tone or content of your reply in any way depending on whether you assume the poster is male or female? 


26 replies

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I honestly don't think I think about gender... I do try and make a judgement as to whether the poster is used to communicating in written English and try and make my reply as simple as unambiguous as possible - I don't always succeed…

Stephen

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I believe I treat everyone the same including many faults

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Can honestly say, I've never ever thought about it!

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Nope, I’m as sarcastic and cutting to everyone in equal measure :stuck_out_tongue:

Ouch, I wrote a whole answer, voted, and it wiped my answer - rhubarb.

throw political correctness to the wind and say what you’re thinking below!


The way I see it:

If the poster comes across to me as wanting help/advice - I will try to help or advise.

If the poster starts by accusing Pure Planet (and often ‘The Community’) of being a bunch of expletive deleteds, and claims everything is ‘your fault’ then depending whether I think I can convince them they are wrong about that or not, will guide my response.

I’ve been rather forthright in some responses recently simply because I’ve concluded that some people asking questions aren’t interested in finding out what’s happened, or even fixing what’s happened - they just want to blame Pure Planet/us.  I don’t like the fact that this place is wearing me down in this respect, partly because I feel that ‘being sarcastic’ or ‘forthright’ is often the worst possible way to get through to someone who’s already not happy - which is part of why I tend to post less now, plus the fact that I feel that there’s no point posting once someone else has answered until we have more information. I’m way to close to answering some posts threatening to leave with “ ‘bye then” - not something likely to help Pure Planet’s Trustpilot and Which scores.

I also feel that sometimes (often?) Pure Planet doesn’t help itself by, at least appearing, to not make some things very plain, such as:

The fact that this forum does not know who you are, or anything about your account - so sticking a thread up saying ‘You’ve….me’ often means nothing, or less than nothing, to us.

The ‘consolidated statement’
 

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🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣, Nanny! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Just as in real life our Wozeeta, treat everyone same, with kindness and respect. What I will say tho, is a very first impression of someone, whether it be virtual or reality, is usually 99% right, but that’s irrespective of sex. 

I always think back to my first posts here, and how I was treated. You don’t forget the kind ones. You soon forget the others. Same in real life.

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But our Gwynd, don’t lower yourself to their level. You stay your usual positive self, reply with your fab new procedure notes, and always stay being you. Don’t allow them to anger you and wear you down to their level. You’ve got the right mindset, the happy persona. If they wanna go thru life with all that doom, gloom and anger, let them be. If you’re born happy, go thru life happy, but don’t let anyone change that of you, 

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Nope, I’m as sarcastic and cutting to everyone in equal measure :stuck_out_tongue:

Wish I said that - solid!

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@Gwyndy

I know what you mean when you mention about the tone of some posts.

I sometimes appears that the poster asking the question doesn't actually want help or replies, they just want a medium to have a moan and complain, 

I got that bad last year that rather than say what I  really wanted to, I just stopped responding to posts and would just log in every other day or so, but didn't reply to any post's.

I honestly don't know how Marc and Nataly cope all day every day trying to placate the people that think by abusing the community members they will get the answers they want, when in reality the answers are usually found in the FAQ's if they could be bothered to look

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@Duppy I’ve often wondered if the people who post in “that way” do it because they think they are talking to customer services and thus believe it’s their right to be impolite. 

@Gwyndy re consolidated statements  I just posted this 

It’s interesting to see how this thread has skewed...(not sarcastic that was a genuine it’s interesting...)

 

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And just out of interest, our Wozeeta, what triggered this poll? Just a fleeting thought or did you see emerging patterns in responses, dependant on a posters gender 🤷‍♀️. Just curious. Great poll 👍, and as you say, it did slightly skew, BUT doesn’t that absolutely prove, that in most people, it’s about much much more than a persons sex? 👍

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It does not cross my mind but what does is how often it is clear sense is not common.

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Nope, I’m as sarcastic and cutting to everyone in equal measure :stuck_out_tongue:

🤣🤣🤣

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Its all about tone, some times you have to atone for your tone even when responding to a bad tone who will not atone.

Tunes make you breath more easily

Keep cool take a shower

I atone

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Strutty 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣, some people don’t even need words, to know they’re on same wavelength, same page of the hymn sheet 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

Its all about tone, some times you have to atone for your tone even when responding to a bad tone who will not atone.

Tunes make you breath more easily

Keep cool take a shower

I atone

I know a number of ‘Tones,’ I suppose individually each is ‘a Tone’ although most for some reason prefer ‘Tony.’

 

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My dads a Tone, he likes to be called “Bone” 😁👍

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@Bev in reply to your earlier and if I may say, very insightful question as to what prompted the poll (you got me there!),  I have a habit of looking at usernames and posts and making a guess whether the poster was male or female and I have to admit guessing how old they might be, (amongst deciphering all the other subtleties about the post). I wondered how many do the same or would admit to it.

Then when I started thinking about it I  wondered whether the tone of my reply was likely to be different depending on who I thought the poster was, and I decided it was likely- ridiculous I know, but I wondered how many other people did that without even realising. 

No worries though I try hard to make my replies equally inappropriate/irritating/annoying (or fun depending on the receiver) for everyone.:robot: (the wozbot strikes again - I hope no one takes that line seriously!)

I wonder how many people have unconscious bias (I was about to add and don’t realise it but then they wouldn’t if it’s unconscious!)

( other trivia questions like how do you stop asparagus being stringy when you ninja it are available...)

 

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Bloomin love that reply our Wozeeta! Loved it!

Firstly, you followed my asparagus soup 🍵making yesterday and never mind the stringy, although I can honestly say mine never ever is, on life, nor celery, The Ninja is too too brilliant, I have two designs our Woz, and seriously adore both! Used daily! BUT the strong wee is a common thing with high percentage of the population, few hours after asparagus and the next day. In a good way 👍. Just shows kidneys working well 👍🤣

Right, so back to your polly! You are sooooooo me, in making many things so fun and positive, even if we don’t even realise it sometimes! Like sub consciously as you say. So so true tho 👍👍👍. I deffo love a good user name, and if ya see a negative one, ya instantly roll ya 🙄and know it’s not a happy bunny that’s just signed up to the community to complain about something. If you see a fun name, it instantly makes you smile, and you like to think it’ll be a nice fun positive individual behind the name. 

Of course, anyone can hide behind a name or a computer screen, but it’s always honesty and warmth that prevails in life, so in my experience, you soon sort the…,what’s the expression…..wheat from the chaf is it 🤷‍♀️and as said before, can get a good feel from first instinct, whether it be real life or virtual. Psychology helps too of course 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Guess most of us like to stay real, show who we truly are, even on a simple community forum. 

Interesting re the AGE thing you try to decipher tho, I don’t think I really do that, but when Steven “Ed Balls” Day 😉😁👍did his fab post recently, we suddenly became a bit fascinated by members ages, well I did 🤣🤣🤣🤣. But no, for me, it’s more about the person as a whole. Stability, warmth, honesty, friendliness, all the traits you see in real life and can soon establish from a simple post.

And re making replies suit the poster etc, I’m inclined to always just be me. Reply as calmly and upbeat as ever. That way, you’d hope that could rub off onto a negative / angry / miserable being, and could potentially turn things around, make them smile, even make new posters switch to PP 🤷‍♀️

This poll is one of my favourite threads you’ve ever done our Wozeeta 👍👍👍👏👏👏👏👏👏

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@Duppy I’ve often wondered if the people who post in “that way” do it because they think they are talking to customer services and thus believe it’s their right to be impolite. 

 

 

And just to add to this fab thread, I remember a few years back, we all discussed, very very very hypothetically of course 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣, all posters being totally anonymised, say by a simple number, that would never be the same number thru the day either. 

So purely anonymised members AND we agreed community managers, cos I remember our Marc saying it’d be an absolute nightmare to do, it’d probably blow the PP forum up 💥💥💥💥💥💥🤣, but from a psychology angle, wouldn’t it be fascinating?! 

You would have no idea when asking a question, if you were receiving an answer from a manager, a long serving member or a new member posting for the very first time! If you approved of the answer or answers, with every post having a new individual ID, you’d still have no absolute clue who you were giving a “like” / praise to, or even criticising.

At the end of the day, hypothetically of course, all results plotted on a graph, with all calculations done and IDs revealed. I bet it’d make for fascinating, totally different, results to what you get once you know who’s who. Absolutely 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

Everybody is equal. but some (Rocket Scientists) are more equal than others.

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Don’t think anyone thinks they’re above anyone else here, not at all, just the hypothetical experiment would deffo truly show how PP titles, or even just names, affect how users reply etc. But that’s the same in any environment,  especially a virtual one. 

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I’m Spartacus 

I’m Spartacus 

Are you sure?

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😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁👍👍🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣the chances of that! And then you seeing the thread! Priceless 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👍👍👍👍👍👍

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